University of Michigan Professor of Chemistry Smol Molikyoos, who teaches advanced quantum chemical computational methods, was recently stumped by the dilemma of having to explain advanced chemical concepts only a professor would know how to explain to his class. Inspired by the willingness of fully-grown adults with actual university degrees to seek the gun policy […]
Self-proclaimed economics and capitalism guru, Friedricha Engelson, violently convulsed in her Econ 101 lecture after her professor triggered her with a cogent understanding of competition in microeconomic theory. Spilling vegan chai latte all over herself and her neighbors, Adamina reportedly woke up everyone in class. The professor noted that, “Friedricha’s distaste for competition is probably […]
Say what you will, but your parents sent you off to college because they’re anxious to get you out of their house. They now have an “empty nest,” as parent-aged peoples call it, and you have free reign to do as you will. To account for what’s surely parental guilt, Bob and Deb probably gave ya an “emergency” credit card.
As you begin your classes at the University of Michigan this fall, you are likely to be bombarded with words like “privilege,” “identity,” and “oppression.” While these might seem innocuous enough — and the first time year hear them you might even pause to think about your privilege and identity — you will soon realize that these words mean that you (white, male, not poor, attractive, able to walk … whatever “identity” that you hold) are not welcome in this circle, that club, or that council.
They only tore up a couple ski resorts, put out a video of an orgy, and roofied girls’ drinks. Come on, Schlissel. Let’s not spoil the fun. Since Schlissel has taken office, nearly every house on campus has either been kicked off or suffered some sort of consequence. A total of 4 houses have been […]
Last night, the BDS resolution proposed by Students Allied for Freedom and Equality (SAFE) failed to pass Central Student Government for the second year in a row. The proposal petitioned the University to boycott, divest from, and sanction (BDS) companies involved in commercial affairs with Israel. After a long-fought #UMDivest campaign that resulted in 25 […]